Saturday, December 17, 2011

A brighter tomorrow??

I keep going to sleep at night awaiting a brighter tomorrow: that never seems to come. Maybe i only remember the days like this/ when i feel alienated among man kinds. unable to relate, incompatible. I am overly sensitive to their negativity, and ridicule. I feel so deeply, that the tiniest little vibration hurts tremendously. I have been cast aside, i have screwed over, and the only time i remember feelings on top, was when i was soaring above, numb to the world. I do not feel a need to go on. If you throw me in therapy, and pour drugs down my throat, all your doing is killing me. Every fiber of me dead, and in turn creating a zombie. Who does that help? you! You cannot accept that some souls are so tortured from past lives, and current, that every moment is like an immobilizing pain. What would you have me do? to live with this, to satisfy you? pretend i am okay and happy? i am done pretending, when no one on this earth can relate or show me the same consideration i construe or convey to them. I do not hate all living beings, i hate those which make life just a little worse. I am just so far away from the light, i can no longer feel its glow on my face. -Jessica J

Creative Commons License
Philosophy Of A Borderline by Jessi James is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 3.0 Unported License.
Based on a work at jamesborderline.blogspot.com
Posted by at
Labels:

1 comment:

  1. greeneyesbell1January 15, 2012 at 10:32 PM

    I can relate,this is just my little perspective from my personal point of view..I myself throughout my life feel like just when i might be coming up from the abyss,something else comes along and pushes me down even further,my emotional context has been pulverized again and again,at times it seems like im on a roller coaster ride that i desperatly want to get of of,my highs are high and my lows...well,they are excruciating...my mind races,i wish it had an on and off switch,i tend to over analyze the smallest thing,especially when it comes to personal aspects of life,relationships,people,conversation.Buti manage to keep on trucking,if it wasnt for my outlets,some amazing people in my life to shoot the shit with etc...,music,(thats a big one),and making someone smile and laugh from something i do or say,lets me still see that light at the end of the tunnel,even when it seems so far away....

    ReplyDelete

Subscribe to: Post Comments (Atom)